Woman in a Seabrook 
After several weeks of waiting for my blood tests results I almost forgot about them. I figured if something was wrong the OBGYN would call. She called today. But the problem is all my blood is normal. Why is that a problem you ask? Well, first of all, it would seem that losing two babies in a six month period of time could be explained with something that might be wrong with me. But my blood work is perfectly normal so there is nothing to “fix.” I am confused. They warned me that I should prepare myself that everything may come back “normal…” but I never thought it would.
I still have to get a biopsy and perhaps something there will be abnormal. And I still have to get my uterus shot with pink dye… I am sure there is a scientific name for this but I forget what it is? Of course, it isn’t as if I want something to be wrong- I just wish there was an explanation- and maybe there never will be. But what if I get through these tests and I am ALL NORMAL?
What an oxy-moron… for the first time in my life I was hoping for bad test results so that I could at least have hope knowing that my losses were a result of XYZ… but my losses, as of today cannot be explained. How frustrating.
I hate not having control. Taking control away from a control freak is like taking crack away from a crack addict… And I know control is an illusion… but still, I like to think I have some… humor me.
I will know more after the remaining tests in March.
Feb 23, 2005
My Blood is Good
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2 comments:
Hey Ashley, I was just about to ask you if you heard back from all your bloodwork. This is good news, though I'm sure right now you were hoping there was something they'd find that would be "fixable." It does suck not having control. Hang in there. How are you feeling these days. You must feel like a weight has been lifted off your shoulders a little. Take care,
Kat
(Ashley) ~
I know that finding the "fixable" thing would be a relief for you - but the fact that nothing was found in your blood is in itself great news. I hope you're feeling better and happier days will begin to wind their way into your life soon. Hang in there.
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